You Can’t Touch This

by Scarlett on December 27, 2009 · Comments

in Scarlett on Films

Avatar

So, Avatar … If I were a blogger worth my salt, I would have written a review within mere minutes of returning from viewing, but in all honesty I wasn’t entirely sure how I felt about the film. Was I entertained? Absolutely. (I saw it in regular 2D and will hereby state for the record that you absolutely can enjoy this film outside of IMAX or 3D effects, so don’t let anyone strong-arm you into paying a higher ticket price!) However, there have been many criticisms that – at its basis – Avatar is a wildly unoriginal retelling of films like Dances With Wolves and Pocahontas. And really, any “fish out of water falls in love” story could apply. But what makes it innovative are all the ancillary details that surround the core story. Being set in the year 2154 and taking place on other planets; a human assimilating into another culture whilst operating an avatar into which their consciousness has been transferred; the culture of the Na’Vi people and how they connect to the many and varied lifeforms around them.

However, Avatar isn’t without its flaws. Jake Sully, the “hero” of our story, seems to have been teleported straight out of a 1970’s post-Vietnam war movie. Why is he still operating a manual wheelchair in the year 2154? Or better yet, why is he even in this condition? It seemed like a cop-out that despite all the tremendously sophisticated technology that was displayed in the film, a paraplegic living in 2154 would still be tooling around in an old-school wheelchair. And Grace smoking cigarettes? In 150 years, people will still be choking on cancer sticks? I guess in some ways, showing two of the film’s most vital characters as flawed humans is more relatable than if they had been perfect specimens of humanity. Still, when you set a movie so far ahead in the future, seeing a little evolution in medical advances and intelligence would have been appreciated.

As you can see, I think fully enjoying this film depends upon your ability to suspend reality, forgo cynicism, and overlook the foibles that will occur to you as you’re watching. As such, the first thing that occurred to me as I was leaving the theater was how much more I would have loved it had I been an awestruck 12 year old once more. Because here’s the thing … I go to movies to be entertained or affected in some way. Whether it’s being moved to laughter or tears; riveted with anticipation; on the edge of my seat in excitement; really any kind of emotion that gets stirred up in a satisfying way makes for a great movie-going experience. And I think as you get older, it takes more doing to eek out those instinctual reactions than it did in childhood. So as the credits rolled, I thought about Jurassic Park – a film that came out when I was 13 and was – perhaps still is – one of the most affecting films I’ve ever seen in a theater. Intense, exciting, terrifying, blood-pumping, heart-racing, you name it. These days, thrills in the theater are a dime a dozen, but back then, Jurassic Park was a revelation. And I can see Avatar becoming the younger generation’s Jurassic Park. It has the fantastical storyline, the special effects, the drama, the excitement. It’s already become one of those rare films that people are making noteworthy for the sense of awe and wonder it stirred within them. But to each their own! And in like fashion, I thought I’d share a few of the films that made an indelible impression in my tender years that are destined – in my eyes – to never be faded, replicated, or duplicated.

Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

Although my first viewing of 1971’s Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory was a goodly 15 years after its initial release, it was as bright and shiny and bizarrely-beautiful as anything being made in the mid-1980’s. It’s definitely one of those films that colored my childhood with a vividly-hued brush stroke of slight madness and immense wonder. I remember secretly licking the wallpaper in various friends’ homes and hoping to finally find one that tasted like schnozberries, and throwing pennies into the mall fountains, wishing that someday I’d grow up and have my own edible mecca of candy-flavored delights. I could never open a Hershey’s bar without biting my lip in anticipation and hoping beyond hope for a glimpse of gold. And although I always fast-forwarded our worn out VHS tape through that maudlin “Cheer Up, Charlie” song (easily the low point of the film), the movie as a whole delighted me every time. Gene Wilder will always be Willy Wonka to me, and I pity the fool who saw the Johnny Depp version first (which I abjectly refuse to watch in full). Definitely one of my lifelong, nostalgic favorites. “A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.” – Willy Wonka

Labyrinth

Speaking of fantastical films that are as timeless now as they were in my childhood, 1986’s Labyrinth has so many brilliant things going for it, it’s almost impossible to pick a favorite element. First and foremost, when you’ve got a film directed by Jim Hensen and produced by George Lucas, it already has “epic” written all over it. Add in the innovative use of Hensen’s Creature Shop Muppets, a fabulously memorable (and quotable) soundtrack, and a truly unique story that’s immensely relateable to kids and teenagers, and you’ve got movie magic. Oh, and there’s the matter of a certain character called Jareth, played by the incomparable David Bowie (although the billing probably should have been shared with his crotch as well!) I also love Jennifer Connelly in this film, and how at times she seemed every bit the bratty teenager, and at other times a worldly soul. Plus she totally cosplayed before it was chic to do so, making her extra full of win! I’ve heard whisperings about a remake of Labyrinth, but I couldn’t find any information to support this (thank goodness!) And besides, no one – but no one – could rock those spandex tights like Bowie! Om nom nom.

Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure

Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure (1989) is one of those films that I can practically quote front-to-back, but never fail to find hilarity in re-watching. In fact, I like to think that my repeat viewings over the past 20 years have contributed to my love of dorky humor and innuendo – not to mention, my still simmering crush on Billy the Kid. (What?! He’s a cutie!) It’s also got to be one of the most immensely quotable movies I’ve ever seen (you can barely go 2 minutes without mentally cataloging a favorite line of dialog) and the fact that I randomly ended up moving to the city where Bill & Ted’s was filmed still tickles me to no end. It’s also another one of those films with a fantastic soundtrack, and although some might say that the movie feels a bit aged (the phone booth teleporter, most notably), it doesn’t feel like an 80’s flick in the same way that John Hughes films of the same era tend to. And I have to say, if I were forced to watch only one movie for the rest of my life, Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure might just be it. (Don’t get me started on the lackluster sequel …) In closing, I’d like to leave you with this sentiment: “SAN DIMAS HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL RULES!”

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon

This one came out of left field, hmmm? Although I can’t say I was quite so “tender” in years when it was released, 2000’s Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon rounds out my short-list of films that have had a profound effect on my movie-watching experiences over the years. You might argue that better Wuxia style films have been made, but CTHD was the first I’d ever seen and I believe it still holds the distinction of being the highest-grossing foreign language film in American history, and was a true breakthrough in a country where many movie-goers turn up their noses at subtitled fare. Having never seen anything like it, I was captured by the martial artistry that managed to be simultaneously delicate and fierce – a lethal ballet, if you will. It had an equally strong story filled with romance, defiance, tradition, and indeed, its fair share of death. I eagerly awaited similar films that followed, such as Hero and House of Flying Daggers, but neither managed to be as emotionally stirring or breathtakingly exciting as CTHD. It’s one of the last films that had me wide-eyed and wowed as I watched it, and that it was filmed on a $15 million dollar budget is testament that you don’t need to spend a fortune to make an effective action-adventure film!

So I’d have loved to see Avatar 15 or 20 years ago; barring that, it would have been interesting to see it with someone who was younger, less worldly and cynical, and more able to be swept up in the story and the effects. And see, that’s the thing – you really can’t review this film without mentioning the special effects, and for good reason. I think they really are done brilliantly, if you’re not one who scoffs at all things CGI. (Personally, I’m all for it!) But strip away the CGI and setting, and you’ve got a familiar story that plays a little tiredly to those of us who have many memorable films to compare it to. However, for many people, Avatar will be the high watermark of film-making for many years to come – and that truly is the touchstone of an effective film, I’d say. After all, three out of the four movies I mentioned above performed very modestly at the box office, but what makes them legendary in my mind is how much I loved them at the time and how much I still adore them to this day. So to all who were awestruck and enchanted by Avatar, remember it well – and go back and see it again if time allows. Some day you’ll be reminiscing about your favorite films, and how you felt the first time you saw them is something that you’ll never forget.

I hope you all had a wonderful holiday, and I’ll see you again in the new year! ♥

  • EvilClaire
    I'm thinking of waiting to see Avatar when it comes out on video. I'm a little agoraphobic so going to the movies is a bit troubling for me. It's nice to have read a review that wasn't bitter and jaded. We're prolly around the same age, maybe me being a few years older, and when i saw Jurassic park i was blown away. I never got to see labyrinth until a couple years ago. Unfortunately, i don't remember much of my childhood so i can't recall any early movies that really filled me with awe, so I'll have to stick with Jurassic park as being my best example.
  • - Rob
    Hi Scarlett,

    Just thought I'd mention that they can fix his spine. He says so in the film. The only problem is that he can't get it done on his crappy veteran pension. Did you miss the whole: "You get me what I need I see to it you get your legs back. You real legs." from Quaritch? Anyway been looking forward to this review. Glad you weren't as obviously biased against Avatar as Spoony. ;)

    - Rob
  • Nope, I caught that part plain n' clear - I just don't buy that 150 years in the future, we won't be issuing automatic prosthetics (or better) to every accident/injury victim before they leave the hospital. Hell, just the last 15 or 20 years alone have produced tremendous advances in all aspects of technology. I just think that someone pushing around a manual wheelchair in a film that involves unbelievable technological breakthroughs seems pretty silly!
  • Rob
    I hope you are right for humanities sake. I would like nothing more than to have a Star Trek future. In Avatar however the economy we have now is really great compared to 150 years from now. It wasn't mentioned to much in the film except for Jake's line: "Not in this economy.", and his line at the end: SPOILER "They went back to their dieing world.", but the Earth basically looks like a complete crap-hole. (Blade Runner Style.) It is not a "hopeful" future, but a complete: "We will destroy our selves and then we will try to destroy other sentient beings." future. People have to wear oxygen masks on the street so there really isn't anything left over for cripples far less the terminally ill.

    - Rob
  • BouncyTEM
    Interesting viewpoint of Avatar. Having been one of those Jurassic Park sweptaways, coupled with what I've heard about Avatar, I could see it becoming the new one for the generation.

    Classic Willy Wonka is still wonderfully awesome. I even managed to bring some really unlucky souls that saw the Depp version first to like the older one better. In this day and age where a lot of people seem to be "OMG SPECIAL EFFECTS YAAAAAAAAAY---*head explode*", that's a testament to the old film's timelessness. There's just some films you DO. NOT. EVER. REMAKE. Really wish they'd figure this out. Especially since Disney's now doing a Yellow Submarine remake. They need to cancel it before it completely destroys everything. ;_;

    Labyrinth! God, that film brings me back years. I always watch it every once in a blue moon and it's still enjoyable, although Bowie still kinda creeps me out, too. That's probably since I'm a guy, though. :P

    Unfortunately, never saw Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure. I know, I know, I need to. :(

    Ah, yes, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. Despite always hearing about how great this is, I've never been able to completely sit through it. For some reason, even though I LOVE the genre, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon just dulls me and makes me interested in other things.

    ...I'd suspect that's probably because it's one of those films which is absolutely great as an introduction to a genre, but not so great as a compliment to the genre. The first film of the type that I ever saw was The Storm Riders.

    Even though it doesn't do much for me, though, I do recognize why it's quite good. :)

    Overall, I can definitely relate! Heh!

    BouncyTEM signing out. I have some super mutants to deal with.
  • If memory serves The Road Warrior (internationally known as Mad Max 2) was from 1981 to 2000 the highest earning non-American film (this could be a Pop Quiz, Hotshot trivia answer soon..). Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon then beat it, and I believe it still holds the title.

    You picked a very good survey of films to compare Avatar to in a nontraditional sense. I think like you, I have a similar take on the movie, which I assume is more along that of Miles and less Noah. It's hard to believe sometimes but the kids who watched Avatar at the age I was when I watched Jurassic Park, weren't alive when I saw the dinosaurs come to life. I've developed a reputation for being cynical and mean-spirited about films I'm reviewing, and I've had to embrace it to standout from the crowd, but the "right" movie can still get me. I'm certain that regardless of my age, if I still had the same repertoire of seen films, I would know that Avatar is thematically and narratively inferior.

    Also Bill & Ted has the most awesomely farfetched premise of any good film. It's a bizarre way to include a history lesson in a movie that's for teens without feeling like a safe after school special.
  • After writing this, I went back and re-watched the Special Features disc that came with the Excellent Adventure/Bogus Journey box set, and it was really interesting to see the way that the film was conceptualized and finally brought to the big screen. A lot changed in the process, but the affection the writers have for Bill & Ted is palpable. Apparently they (along with Alex Winter and Keanu Reeves) have long bandied about the idea of doing a "Bill & Ted Turn 40" style film. I would LOVE to see that! =)
  • this was a very thoughtful list. and yeah I'm afraid I'm also going to be a bit too cynical to see this movie as awe inspiring...though I do want to see all the pretty CG stuff.
  • GonzoLink
    Glad to hear that you were able to enjoy Avatar without having to spring for the extra dimension (although I very much intend to see it that way... just sayin'). It's interesting that you'd bring up Jurassic Park as an example because I actually saw it in theaters too when I was about six years old and can vividly remember literally jumping out of my seat when the raptor jumped up through the ceiling and very nearly nabbed Lex. Actually, all the movies you mentioned are ones that I saw when I was fairly young and have fond memories of:

    Willy Wonka: I first heard about the book when I was in second grade and when I found out that they had made a movie as well, I decided to forgo the boredom of reading (remember, second grade) and check out the movie instead. I still love it to this day and I'll never forget the first moment Wonka opened the door to the Chocolate Room, a moment I was not expecting to be a musical number but now I look forward to every time I see it. Wlthough you are very much correct in that "Cheer Up Charlie" is the ultimate low when it comes to sappy music in kids movies (hell, my MOM even made me fast-forward through it... not that she needed to persuade me too much).

    Labyrinth: I've only seen this movie once when I was around 7 or 8, but I definitely remember thinking that it was certainly something special. I don't recall too much save for bits and pieces, but my most prominent memory would have to be the end where Jen and David finally meet. I don't remember the song, nor how the plot progressed itself either for that matter, but I do remember the moment where David walks out from under the platform and to finally meet Jen face to face. I also remember that gnarled troll dude taking a leak the first time we see him (seriously Jim Henson... wtf?)

    Bill and Ted: EXCELLENT! I saw this one when I was in middle school (I think 8th grade) and I definitely got a ton of millage out of it. I recently saw it on the big screen in my college town of Arcata, CA and even though I hadn't seen it in years, I was still only able to go a maximum of two minutes without either quoting someone or air-guitaring at the right moment. I'd be hard pressed to pick a favorite moment or line from this masterpiece as they are all awesome, but definitely one of my favorites is when they travel to ancient Greece and "philosophize" with So-crates, probably because they set it up and then follow through on it so perfectly (Dust... Wind... Dude!).

    Crouching Tiger: Again, another movie I saw when I was in middle school but this one on the big screen for my first viewing. I honestly didn't know what to expect when I saw it and I had been brought there by my parents, so I wasn't really too excited (the subtitles didn't exactly boost my confidence either). All of that vanished however when the actors first took to the sky on invisible wires to fight in the trees. I literally was not expecting it and it was one of those elements that truly allowed me to suspend my disbelief since it was pulled off so well. I remember watching it after it had been released on video and actually being really pissed off that it was now dubbed with english speaking voices instead of having subtitles. It really just brought me out of the moment and constantly reminded me that yes, I was in fact watching a movie (although the complete disregard of the laws of physics didn't really help either).

    While Avatar is undoubtedly a technical marvel first and foremost, the framework that it structures its special effects around is something much older than the obvious connection everybody's been making. The whole "civilized white man gets taken in by 'savage' civilization and learns something from it" is a lot older than Dances with Wolves. Cameron seems to understand that you don't need to overly complicate your stories in order to have a good time at the movies and also happens to have a real eye for the special effects of moviemaking. Every movie he's ever made since Terminator has raised the bar on a technical level and he still manages to make his characters the real stars (although given that I've yet to see Avatar that could very well change... I've heard grumblings beyond just Spoony that the characters are fairly one-dimensional). All in all though I'm glad to hear that you were able to enjoy yourself because in the end, that's what going to the movies is supposed to accomplish.
  • There's really nothing I can add except to say "I concur!" And if you don't have a blog yet, Gonzo, you really should get one! =)
  • GonzoLink
    The odd thing is that I actually DO have a blog on Blogger, I just haven't done jack shit with it. I call it The Bag as I encourage people to "Take from it what you will." There isn't anything there yet but I think I just might make something happen one of these days. Anyhoo, have a happy new year!
    http://thebag1121.blogspot.com/
  • These are all movies that wowed my and fired up my imagination when I saw them as a kid (Or young adult, in the case of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon). Even at my age, I'm still able to view movies with a child-like sense of wonder. I'm really looking forward to seeing Avatar, preferably in 3D.

    AS far as criticism about the originality of the story goes, unoriginality doesn't bother me as much as long as the story is told well. The reality is, there are no original ideas anymore. And originality doesn't necessarily equal quality. I'm reserving judgement until I see the movie and determine if Avater has pulled it off.
  • Well said, Jeff. And I think the story of Avatar was told well; however, it still smacked a little too close to earlier films like Pocahontas and Dances With Wolves for me. There was too much about the Na'Vi people that closely mirrored the Native Americans - even the name Na'Vi is too close to "Native" for my liking. I think with some polish and fresh thinking, it could have been more of an original story, but it was still effective. And I daresay that you'll probably really enjoy it!
  • SethTheXenocide
    WILD STALLIONS.

    And I knew seeing the previews of Avatar I wouldn't want to watch it. I haven't seen it and I'm not complaining about it. I've just had enough movies about white guilt and how I should respect other cultures. I do, I get it. Not saying there isn't a demographic that needs a movie like this but it's certainly not for me. The special effects and the spectacle of it just isn't enough to make me want to watch it.
  • I believe you meant WYLD STALLYONS? Get your totally bodacious spelling right, you medieval dickweed! ;-)

    Oops, I completely forgot to mention the whole "white guilt" thing. Honestly, that's another big thing that you need to release your cynicism about and overlook in order to enjoy Avatar - that's why I think this film is much more effective for the younger generation. Overall a good film, but nothing spectacular.
  • I hate to go against you, Scarlett. I really do, because I love you to death, but let's just say this: Crouching Tiger is my personal 'Final Fantasy 8'

    Everyone loves it, but the more I watch that movie, the more I find wrong with it.
  • Fair enough, Troy! As I mentioned, it was the first "Wuxia" style film I'd ever seen and it just took my breath away. It's the kind of movie I watch purely to be entertained and swept up in the story and cinematography, so I haven't noticed the flaws. And although I probably should admit this, I actually *prefer* the dubbed version so I can concentrate more on the action. I know, I know! I should probably be killed. ;-)
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